I'm fine here

Today is the 6th day I'm here. I'm fine overall, just had a little emotion disturbance on the 1st night...
after reading blogs and cards...plus unpacking those stuff i used in Miri...
aish... plus i was super tired. XD
So it's understandable....

Now i'm adapting quite well, didn't went to the Lord's day meeting but met the saints at night.
Was glad that there are saints here.
Although there are still strangers to me, but there is Lord in everyone of them.

I'll be fine here, so everyone of you reading. Please be fine for my sake too. ^^

21st feb

Good bye everyone. Its not a big deal leaving, I know. But I don't know, this is the 1st time me feeling like this when leaving...

In these 4 years outside of Miri, never once I felt like crying...

but i cried this time, not sure of the reason..maybe there is a lot..
maybe i am scared of flying so far alone since my dad was there when i 1st went to kl...

maybe kl wasn't that far...maybe because this is the 1st time going overseas for so long and alone..

maybe there is too many gatherings this time... with ppl that made me hesitant to leave...

Thanks for all the gifts and cards. They made me cry....
Thanks for coming to the airport, it almost made me cry. hahaha

luckily i didn't though, luckily i didnt. ^^

Wish you all a blessed year.

friday

left 9 days...

not much time left.

feeling bad..should not be so greedy

should not say so much after all this time.

about leaving

There are things that make me want to leave as soon as possible, but at the same time

there is a person that make me feel like staying longer...

if I can, I would leave everything behind...

if I can, I may not come back at all.

if I can, I want to be without family.

Sounds selfish.. but this is what I want at the moment.

I'll be free but poor. lol

2011/2/9

12 days left before I am leaving Miri.

Went to dentist for some checkup today. My teeth was fine so the doc just did scaling and polishing for me. She is much better than the one in SS15, at least it didn't hurt and bleed that much this time.

Before going in, I saw ppl that I don't want to see. I was surprised when i saw them, well only a glance actually...never look directly at the faces..

just treat them as invisible...

But my heart was beating faster and if I have had a car, I will go out and just go home. Fight or flight response....if I can, most probably is flight...

Of course because I can't...then... just pretend they are invisible.

Sigh